


The Berwald Protection Squad

by Decada, FinSu



Category: Hetalia: Axis Powers
Genre: Gen, M/M, Omega Verse, Romantic Comedy, spy mission
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-03-11
Updated: 2015-05-09
Packaged: 2018-03-17 10:04:18
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 4,872
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3525137
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Decada/pseuds/Decada, https://archiveofourown.org/users/FinSu/pseuds/FinSu
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Protecting Berwald and warding off suitors that tried to creep on him was such a simple job for Mathias, Lukas, and Emil. And then he showed up. Omegaverse Nordic antics.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Sooo... the awesometastic FinSu and I decided to collab on our first fic together! Lots of hilarity will come, so please, have a seat, get some snacks, and enjoy the trouble these dorks will go through for the protection of the beloved Berwald!

The brothers sat in a sort of circle around the dining room table, glancing from one to the other and folding, unfolding, and refolding their hands on the wooden surface. None of them spoke aloud, but they were thinking of the same thing.

They have a problem.

They were trying to remember how it all went so wrong and where it started, but even more, they were thinking-

“Okay, guys, we really need to think of a solution, pronto,” Mathias said.

His suggestion was met with exasperated sighs, part of it because of him stating the obvious, part of it because the stress of it all was exhausting them right then as they sat. 

They didn't know where it went wrong; they were careful, so careful, in trying to protect him because he was simply not ready for this type of thing, and so far it has worked: no suitors came knocking on their door, no one made phone calls or sent letters or emails, no one tried to become chums with them to get to him, and it all seemed like easy protection from then on, especially with the one they're trying to protect not showing much interest in his suitors.

But then he came along, and it was like their charge and brother suddenly got a boost of the horny hormone. Well, maybe “horny” was too strong of a term to describe it, but he definitely fell for the bright violet eyes, soft smile, and that sweet cherub face as soon as the new challenge just sashayed his way into their lives and so obviously reciprocated the feelings.

They have a big problem.

“So, what're we gonna do about Berwald and this... other guy?” Emil asked, unfolding his hands as well and looking at the lines in his palms as if he can find the answer there.

Lukas and Mathias shrugged. 

"I don't know what we can do. Nothing's working! Intimidation isn't working, threats aren't working, and being possessive of him only makes Berwald angry with us." Lukas took a sip of his coffee.

It was Emil's pet puffin, Mr. Puffin, who made the winning suggestion.

"Why not send that alpha on a wild goose chase? Send him far away to somewhere dangerous for some item. If he comes back he might realize mating with Berwald is too much trouble, or he might not come back at all."

The kitchen was silent until Mathias screamed, "That's a great idea!"

Lukas kicked him under the table. "Keep it down. You want Berwald to hear us?"

A knock on the door ended the conversation. It was Tino. He had arrived to take Berwald on a date.

Heavy glares met Tino as the door was opened. The short alpha ignored them, and instead took the arm of their quiet omega brother, who had come down stairs just in time.

Tino gave them a smirk and he shut the door behind them.

The 3 alphas sat seething in their chairs.

"The nerve of that alpha! Stealing our precious omega brother." Mathias growled, clenching his hands tightly together to the point his knuckles turned white.

Emil, the least aggressive of the alpha brothers, just sighed and shook his head. "If we go through with that ridiculous plan, and Tino doesn't make it or decides to forget Berwald, don't you think Berwald would be devastated? It would break his heart."

That sure brought them down.

"Back to square one it is." Lukas muttered.

Mathias jumped to his feet, tossing his beer bottle into the recycling bin. "Let's spy on their date! For all we know, Tino could be flirting with another omega or something."

Lukas and Emil exchanged exasperated glances. Mathias may be the oldest of them all, but he sure wasn't the most mature. He was also the most possessive of Berwald.

Maybe trying to keep their innocent brother from finding a mate isn't nice, but they at least had a good reason to be worried about him. 

Many alphas over the years had creeped on Berwald, whether catcalling him in the street or "accidentally" feeling him up. 

These experiences left Berwald terrified of most alphas. He stopped leaving the house unless at least one of his brothers escorted him. He wouldn't go out at night. He became a shell of his former self, to the point where he hardly talked.

But now that Tino was in the picture, they saw their shy, sensitive brother start to come out of his shell. And they were jealous. Jealous, paranoid, and worried about the wellbeing of their brother.

And it was this jealousy and paranoia that made Emil and Lukas finally nod. “Okay,” they said together.

Mathias choked on his beer at the response. “Really?” He coughed, wiping the beer that dribbled on his chin. 

Emil shrugged. “Yeah, really. I mean, I don’t like the thought of stalking them on their date either, but it’s better than sending Berwald’s boyfriend on a dangerous mission and possibly putting his life in peril.” He glared pointedly up at Mr. Puffin, who simply pecked at something in his wing’s feathers to avoid meeting Emil’s eyes. 

“Wow, you guys really like this idea, huh?” Mathias asked. Although this wasn’t the first time his brothers agreed that his idea was good enough to try, something like that was rare for him. 

“Yes, we do, now how about we actually get started on it instead of letting you revel in the moment, please?” Lukas said. “If we’re going to spy on Tino during their date and get some info on him, we should get going and actually follow them.”

“Right.” Emil looked from Lukas to Mathias. “Any idea where they’re heading, by the way?”

“Yep! Hold on a second!” Mathias set his beer bottle on the table and darted out of the room. He went to his room, rummaged through his desk drawer, and took out an old-looking notebook that he took back downstairs. He raised it above his head and then slammed it in the middle of the table. “Here it is!”

“What is it?” Lukas asked, he and Emil staring at the wrinkled notebook cover.

Mathias took his seat and picked the notebook back up. “It’s my journal I use to keep track of Berwald’s dates."

Emil cocked an eyebrow. "Isn't that really creepy? That sounds like something Lukas would do." He ignored the glare Lukas sent him.

“Where’d ya think I got the idea from?” Mathias sent a smirk at Lukas’s way. He flipped it to the most recent entry he made. “Been keeping tabs ever since that little smiling turd got his eyes on Berwald. Let’s see....”

He skimmed over the pages and made an “aha” noise under his breath. “They’re heading to some fancy bar downtown.”

"A bar? Really? You know Berwald doesn't drink. And he tends to stay away away from drunk people." Emil, ever the cynical voice of reason retorted.

“This is just information I got while listening in on their conversation, little guy. Whatever this bar is, it probably has a ton of other stuff if he lets Tino take him there. All sorts of fish dishes, open shows, karaoke- wait, Berwald hates that one. But this seems like a pretty good spot.” He looked up. “How come we never go there?”

“Focus, Mathias,” Lukas said.

“I am, I am. Now, we have the address, and their reservation starts in a half hour. If we leave now, we have enough time to find a good place to hide there before they settle in. We’re gonna need some disguises, some walkie talkies, some code names-”

“Or we go on ahead and just watch from afar? You know, like not give out what we’re doing there and stick out like a sore thumb for the sake of ‘looking conspicuous’? That may work.”

Mr. Puffin huffed at Emil’s suggestion. “Wow, you guys really don’t know how to make a spy mission cool. You should at least get some hats and sunglasses to hide your faces so they won’t recognize you immediately.”

Lukas and Emil nodded, with Mathias looking at them both and feeling miffed that they only listened to his advice of getting a disguise when it came from a bird. But with the plan completed, he grinned and slapped something else on the table.

“Alright, Berwald Protection Squad is underway!” He dramatically removed his hand from the item, revealing a black and white photo of Tino with little conspiracy notes written on it. “Let’s do this!”

Lukas, Emil, and Mr. Puffin glanced at the photo, at each other, and back at Mathias. “You have to make everything into a dramatic movie, don’t you?” Lukas asked.


	2. Chapter 2

As the alpha trio made their way to the bar, they sat in a corner and ordered food, their glares trained on the small alpha chatting up their brother, who laughed at some joke his boyfriend told.

They took up the menus on the table and opened them to blend in with the rest of the bar’s patrons, but kept their eyes fixed on the couple. The more their target laughed and giggled and touched his fingers on Berwald’s hand, the hotter their faces burned.

“So, what do we do?” Emil whispered to the others after they’ve watched their brother and their target being affectionate with each other for fifteen minutes now. “Shouldn’t we do something more than just watch?”

Lukas leaned toward him and whispered back, “We’re going to see if we can get as much information on him as possible. Watch his movements, his reactions to Berwald, what he orders, if he tries to take this date to another step-”

“Another step?”

“He means trying to bone Berwald.” Mathias said. The table thumped from movement underneath it, and Mathias gasped and clamped his mouth shut, trying to keep in the yelp of pain.

Lukas stared hard at him. “Don’t say things like that around my brother, he’s too young to know about that sort of stuff.”

“Except I take classes for this type of stuff, Lukas. I know perfectly well what that ‘other step’ is.” Emil huffed, arms folded against his chest.

“So you kicked me for nothing, Luke!” Mathias grunted as he reached under the table to rub his calf.

“Yeah, I guess I did,” Lukas replied, a hint of guilt for his act and disappointment at Emil’s loss of innocence etched on his face. “Sorry. Okay, so what do we have on Tino so far?”

Mathias straightened in his seat. “Nothing yet, except he’s an Alpha who’s possibly ready to fuck, and he always seem to come around with treats when Ber-Ber’s in heat. He’s really persistent when it comes to getting in our brother’s pants.”

“But they don’t end up mating when he comes over, even during Berwald’s heat,” Emil said.

Mathias grumbled under his breath and crossed his arms. "I still don't like him or trust him."

Lukas rolled his eyes and focused on eating his meal. "Can you at least TRY to act like a normal person? Do you want Berwald to find out why we're really here?" 

He gestured to where Berwald and Tino were giving them odd looks and discussing something.

Emil took a nonchalant gulp of his coke. "Too late for that, Lukas." He pointed to the couple, who was giving them frustrated looks as they got up and left the bar.

“Dammit, cover blown!” Mathias started to stand and gestured aggressively at the others to do the same. “C’mon, you two, since you already blew it! Switch the disguises!”

“But…” Lukas and Emil looked at their food that they ordered.

Mathias rolled his eyes and shook his head, replacing the backwards cap on his head with a beanie and taking off his jacket to tie around his waist. “Just get a carry-out pack and follow me! We’re running low on precious precious spy time!” He dumped some money on the table and went to the door. He stood outside and kept his eyes on the retreating backs of their brother and their number one enemy as he waited for his other brothers to come.

Many minutes later, when Mathias’s already-thin patience was stretched out so much he started pacing, Lukas and Emil exited the door with fancy looking bags in hand. 

“Oh my god, what the hell took you guys so damn long?!” Mathias shouted.

“We waited for carry out packages, like you said.” Lukas replied. He nodded at Emil, who held up a second, smaller bag. “And little brother wanted to order some fish for Mr. Puffin to apologize for not being able to come.”

Emil sent a sideway glare towards Lukas. “Y’know, just because today isn’t an ordinary day, doesn’t mean you get to call me little-”

“Not the time, Emil!” Mathias moved behind Lukas and Emil and shoved them from the back in the direction where he last saw Berwald and Tino headed. “We have absolutely no time to lose now! I only got enough info to tell me that they were coming to this bar, and now we have to find where ever the hell else they went!”

Lukas looked over his shoulder and raised an eyebrow. “I thought you were watching them until we got out of the restaurant?”

“I was, Lukas, I was! I can only watch them for so long in this spot until they disappeared!” He pushed them across the street when the road was clear.

“Okay, but why didn’t you just follow them and let us catch up with you?”

“Because I can’t just leave you guys here!”

“You could have called us.” Emil raised his iPhone to show Mathias. “These are a thing, you know.”

Mathias paused and looked at the phone. He glared in Emil’s eyes, huffed, and continue to push them down the block. 

The search took a long time to complete, even when they were able to rule out places Berwald wouldn’t set foot in.

Almost everyone looked the same from behind when they entered one building after the other, causing them to mistakenly stalk complete strangers until they saw their faces and learn that it was in fact not the people they were looking for.

Finally, after visiting their fifteenth place and apologizing profusely to their 30th “Berwald”, Emil threw his hands up in the air. 

“Alright, I've had it! This is not working at all!” He pulled out his phone again and started dialing.

Mathias crossed his arms. “And you think calling Berwald and asking him where he and his date are is going to work?”

“No!” He hung up immediately, red in the face and lips pouting. A moment later, he dialed again. Putting the phone to his ear, Emil signaled for silence with his finger and listened. Mathias and Lukas couldn’t hear what was going on at the other end, but it appeared that whomever Emil was calling, they answered.

"Xiao Chun, I need you to help us track down Berwald."

"Like, OMG Emil, it's the middle of the night in China. I'm not taking a flight out in the middle of the night to northern Europe so you can, like, stalk your omega brother and his date. Like, bye." Xiao Chun replied shortly.

Emil sighed. Meeting his older brothers' quizzical looks, he informed them that Hong Kong was not willing to help.

“Gimme that!” Mathias snatched the phone away and brought it to his ear. He turned away to pointedly ignore Emil’s glare.

“Now listen here, you little shit, I know that to you, Berwald is an impersonal Omega who you don’t care whom he gave his virginity to, but to us, he’s a precious little diamond that should not be defiled by anyone! And I mean anyone! Now, I want you to get off your lazy ass, get on that computer, and- hello? Hello?!”

Mathias grunted and furiously tapped out the number.

Lukas rolled his eyes and Emil groaned in irritation. 

"He said he won't help us Mathias. Leave him alone."

“Like hell, he won’t help us!” Mathias tapped the phone’s screen more angrily, huffing through his nostrils so loudly it was like hearing an angry bull breathe down one’s neck.

Lukas leaned towards Emil and whispered, “He knows he’s not gonna get better results if he keeps yelling at Xiao like that, right?”

Emil shook his head and snatched the phone out of Mathias’s hand, who spun around quickly and glowered at him. Emil held the phone away. “If you insist on bugging Xiao Chun after he told us no, at least let me ask him the right-”

“Mathias, I swear to God,” they heard from the phone, “I will get out of this bed, fly over there, and kick your Viking, all-you-can-eat-sandwich-eating, beer-guzzling ass-”

Emil quickly put the phone to his ear. “No, no, Xiao Chun, it’s me again, Emil.”

Xiao Chun sighed in exasperation. “Uuugh, Emil, what the hell? Just because you’re calling again doesn’t mean I’m going to change my mind anytime soon-”

“No, but Xiao Chun, listen, please.” Emil’s tone suddenly changed, taking on a heartstring-tugging plea that was so touching and adorable that even Lukas was ready to do whatever Emil wanted.

“We really need your help over here. Like Mathias said, Berwald is in big trouble with this guy, we’re sure of it. And we’re trying to protect him with all our might, but it’s useless when we don’t have your tracking skills.”

"Like, I'm sorry Emil, but I can't help you. Laoshi, like, confiscated my credit cards after I spent too much on, like, kung fu movies and pandas." Xiao Chun sounded genuinely remorseful.

Mathias leaned to the phone and shouted at it- and in the process, in Emil’s ear as well-

“Like our brother’s imminent sexual encounter has anything to do with your spending problem-!”

Emil shoved Mathias’s face away and stepped away. 

With the pleading tone still on, Emil said, “Xiao Chun, please, this thing is bigger than a lot of us. Berwald is getting ready to do something that he doesn’t fully understand, and this Tino jerk is leading him right along. It’s terrifying, knowing that our innocent brother is going to places he doesn’t know about.”

Lukas looked from Emil to Mathias. “Why is he speaking as if he know about this type of stuff-?”

“And I know that if this was one of your siblings, you’d do anything you can to prevent them from doing something they’d regret. So, please, Xiao Chun, Help me.”

A pause on the other end, followed by a sigh. “Emil-”

“Please, Xiao Chun! I’m begging you! I’ll even-” Emil glanced towards Lukas and Mathias, walking off and hunching his shoulders so his brothers wouldn’t hear. “I’ll even do that thing you wanted us to do for the longest-”

“Oooh, my god, my brother is propositioning sex!” Lukas charged at Emil and tried to snatch the phone away. 

“No, Emil, we are not allowing you to get this low for Berwald’s protection! I’m not gonna sacrifice your virginity for his! Gimme the phone, Emil!”

“Leave me the fuck alone, Lukas! And I am not proposing sex, jesus christ!” Emil kicked Lukas away, who tumbled to the ground and looked up at his younger brother with a subtle look of anguish. 

Ignoring the look, Emil went back to the call. “If you do this thing for me and help us protect Berwald from this Tino prick, I’ll go to that anime convention with you cosplaying Clear to your Aoba like you asked.” 

At the last statement, Emil glared at Lukas as if to say, You see, I told you I’m not propositioning sex!

Xiao Chun was silent for a moment as he thought it over. 

"Tempting offer, but I, like, still don't have a way to get from China to Sweden. Like I said, Laoshi confiscated my credit cards. 

However, if you and your brothers can, like, find a way to get me over to your house, I'll do it. But only because you, like, promised to go to an anime convention with me. In cosplay."

Emil nodded. “I’ll have something set up for you. Get packed.”

Xiao Chun pouted and whined into the phone, "But Emil, how can I get packed and sneak out if, like, I don't know the plan? Plus, like, not to be mean or anything, but I totally don't trust Mathias or Lukas. Laoshi told me what they're capable of."

“No worries there, either; I’ll have these two under control-”

Mathias scoffed and crossed his arms. “Who are you talking about ‘under control’, you little-!”

“-And as for the plan, I’ll send you a detailed message and how far we are in this and what you can do on the plane. Make up an excuse if anyone in your family asks.”

"Like, okay." Xiao Chun packed a bag and hurried to the airport.

Several hours later he showed up at their house. He knocked and tried the door knob, surprised that it was unlocked. He opened it and poked his head inside. 

“Hey, Emil, are you guys in here?” Xiao shouted. “You guys do know you left your door unlocked?” He peered further inside the house and cautiously stepped inside. “I’m coming in, now, don’t do anything rash, Mathias-”

“Just get yer ass in here, you panda-loving fuck, we got business to take care of!” 

Xiao jumped back and was ready to turn tail and flee from the sudden Danish loudness, but after understanding what Mathias shouted and realizing that he wasn’t in immediate danger, he stepped inside. “Where are you guys?”

“In the kitchen, Xiao,” Emil called out.

Xiao hurried into the kitchen and paused at the door when he was greeted by hardened, serious stares. Even Lukas’ stare, as nonchalant as it seemed, was enough to make Xiao speechless for a few moments. He turned to Emil, knowing that at least Emil didn’t hate him or dislike him at the moment. 

“...So, like, I got your message at the airport, Emil. And I don’t wanna sound rude, but aren’t you guys taking this too seriously?”

Mathias slapped his hand on the table and looked away. “See, I knew it, I knew the little punk wasn’t going to help us!”

“I did not say that I wasn’t going to help you guys!” Xiao dumped his bag at the kitchen’s doorway and took a seat at the table, making sure to match Mathias’s glare.

“I just think that you guys are going overboard with this, and you don’t really know much about this Tino guy, yanno? Plus, calling me a punk and a panda-loving fuck will get you nowhere.”

Lukas waved at him to get his attention. “Hey, Xiao, don’t mind Mathias, ‘kay? He’s just tense about this thing. We all are.” He sighed.

“And we’re not going overboard with anything. It’s just our Alpha way, and Berwald…Berwald is too fragile to handle something big like potentially having sex with this complete stranger. This complete stranger who has no damn respect for his target’s brothers.”

“What did he do?”

Mathias huffed and shifted in his seat, preparing himself for a big rant. “Oh, my god, so like, he’s just being this big disrespectful dick and acting like he already owns Berwald or some shit. 

“He’s coming around freely, flaunting his little Alpha ass and getting on our fucking nerves and flirting with Berwald a lot and making it so fucking obvious that he’s planning on gettin’ in Berwald’s pants and breaking his precious chastity belt and Berwald simply cannot handle that nor does he deserve to be treated like some prize to be won!”

Xiao leaned his elbows on the table and folded his hands, listening intently. “Ah ha… you do know how obsessive and bullshit-y this sounds, right?”

“No, Xiao, you don’t get it,” Emil shook his head. “I know we sound completely weird about this, but… Berwald’s an Omega. A completely wimpy Omega at that.”

“I don’t think he’s, like, that wimpy-”

“And he’s been too afraid to speak up at all even before his nature came to light. 

“Can you imagine knowing that if he got into a sexual situation with that cocky bastard and his mind was saying no but his body was saying yes, and he’s just too confused by it all to know that he wasn’t truly ready, that he wouldn’t be able to stop it because he just doesn’t know what to do, but his sexual partner does and wants to take advantage of Berwald’s lack of knowledge? That’s terrifying, Xiao. It’s terrifying.”

“Okay, I think I see your point…”

Lukas looked into Xiao’s eyes earnestly. “And you’ll truly help us?”

Xiao leaned back in his seat and shrugged. “I already said I will, I just want to see how bizarre all of this is before I go in too deep and be associated with some crime you guys are planning.” He rubbed his hands together. “Now, where’s my work station?”

Mathias raised an eyebrow, "Aren't you just gonna set up some GPS thing to track him?"

Xiao Chun gave Mathias a look. "I need to, like, gather stuff first. Then I'll set up the 'GPS thing'. First things first: give me a lock of Berwald's hair. Then I need to know where the restaurant is and which way they headed." 

Xiao Chun busily assembled the small tracker, using parts from his old GameBoy Advance, along with bits and pieces of other items. 

As he did so, Emil, Lukas, and Mathias briefly looked at each other, until Lukas left to retrieve the hair and Mathias stepped forward. He pulled out a slip of notebook paper and handed it to Xiao Chun. 

“We were at the Lion’s Den Bar and Grill on Hasten Street when the suspect and the target headed..” He stopped and squinted at the ceiling. As he placed himself back at the Lion’s Den door where he watched Tino get away with his precious younger brother, he started making calculations on the direction they took. “...They headed 95 degrees North East!”

“Hasten Street. They just went down Hasten Street, possibly to another bar and grill place so they could get away from us.” Emil said to clarify and simplify Mathias’ information. “They left before they even got their drinks.”

Xiao raised an eyebrow. “I thought Berwald seriously hated liquor?”

Emil nodded. “True, he does, but some bars around here do give nonalcoholic options, so-”

“So we need to find bars with nonalcoholic drinks around Hasten Street.” Lukas was standing by the doorway when he spoke up, holding up a messy lock of blond hair in his fingers. His usually-stoic features had a hint of a smirk, as if he was pleased with his television-like entrance into the conversation.

“You seriously didn’t do that on purpose, did you?” Emil asked, knowing his brother well enough that Lukas did time that.

“Nah, my timin’ is just perfect, is all.” He walked up to Xiao and placed the hair on the table in front of him. He took a seat and watched as Xiao finished setting up his tracking system. He crossed his arms and leaned back in his chair. 

“What are you planning on doing with that hair anyways?"

Xiao Chun continued to work. "This is a DNA tracker. With your brother's hair in it. Which will tell us exactly where he is." He deadpanned at Lukas.

Mathias jumped to his feet, "What are we waiting for then? Let's go!"

Xiao Chun rolled his eyes, already tired of Mathias' antics and silently wondering how on earth the others could stomach having to deal with him all the time.

Emil whispered something in Xiao Chun's ear, to which he snorted and added, "I know, right?" 

The 2 teenage alphas continued to chat while Xiao Chun led the way with Mathias being dragged by Lukas.

Mathias was whining about not being able to finish his beer and had wanted to bring it along, until Lukas crushed the can in his grip and stepped on it while staring Mathias dead in the eyes.

"The longer we wait the greater the chance of Tino trying something." He had snapped at his oldest brother.

Mathias’s lower lip quivered, his sad blue eyes going from the can on the ground to the hard, serious stare from Lukas. “You didn’t have to do that…” he said softly. If he weren’t in front of everyone, he would’ve gotten on his knees and wail in mourning over his beer. The last can of beer until they go shopping, and who knows how long that’ll be when they have to chase down their brother and his boyfriend.

“Relax, Mathias, we’ll buy you another one after this is over,” Emil said, patting Mathias’s shoulder when they all stopped. “Come on, before we lose our location on Berwald and Tino.”

Xiao nodded, keeping his eyes on the tracking device beeping in the palm of his hand. “Agree. But we should be close by; the tracker says they're right… over… here!”

They all stopped, looking up at the large, brightly colored sign.

They looked at each other with raised eyebrows and shaking heads. “King Oliver’s Arcade?”


End file.
